Save Me
by OnTheGround2012
Summary: This is my prompt and standalone. Jackson and Stiles meet on rehab where they fall for each other but their relationship is not always going to be easy. The standalone explains a chapter of that relationship.
1. Chapter 1 - Prompt

**Notes:** Angst and break-ups inspired the prompt I used for the Fanmix I posted on AO3 and Tumblr. This is not a series. I wrote the prompt and made the fanmix, and this year I've written a standalone based on it but it's not meant to be a series. Part 2 is that standalone.

 **Prompt:**

Jackson Whittemore's life as a lawyer is good… maybe _too_ good, with late nights spent working with clients and easy access to alcohol, and women and men who are impressed by his track record. When his success rate starts to slip, his best friend Danny becomes concerned and tries to convince him to get on the wagon. Jackson refused, positive that he can manage his career _and_ his drinking until his father finds him drunk at his desk in the middle of the day rather than at an appointment. After a blow up fight, Jackson is forced to leave Whittemore and Whittemore and enter rehab.

Stiles Stilinski has it all. He has the best career any guy could want as a celebrated rock star. But he refuses to listen to his bassist and best friend Scott when drugs start to overtake his life, and the tabloids eat it up. Soon there is more bad news that good coming out about the band, and the record label can't take it any more and drops the band. Stiles starts to spiral out of control, using drugs to get back the high he had when he was on stage, and there is nothing Scott can do about it. When he hits rock bottom, he is lost until Scott makes the suggestion that he goes into rehab.

Instant attraction makes for a rocky beginning when Jackson and Stiles meet. They know there's something between them, but they have no idea how to talk to each other outside of the physical. Jackson's from money and education, and Stiles is all about the music. But once they manage to set aside their differences and find a friendship, they also discover just how good they can be together. They anchor each other, offering support to get through rehab, and they stick together when they finally are able to leave.

Jackson goes back to the world he belongs in, but Stiles drifts, uncertain what to do in a world without music. He moves in with Jackson and takes a job in the supermarket, but it's unfulfilling and frustrating to the boy who dreams of being on stage and speaking with his music. Jackson tries to encourage Stiles to play and sing again, but without the band, and knowing the risks that it involves, Stiles barely tries, and eventually stops.

But life isn't without risks, and Stiles quickly realizes that being Jackson's trophy "wife" comes with its own set of temptations. He is left on his own at high-powered gatherings, surrounded by people who are more than willing to offer him just a little hit to take the edge off. Bored, tired, and frustrated, Stiles can't resist, and he accepts. Once… twice… three times and it's becoming a habit again. But it's _okay_. Stiles can keep it under control, he's sure of it. It's just at parties. Just once a week, maybe twice, and never where Jackson can see. Except Jackson _does_ find out and begs him to stop using.

Stiles promises to stop, but it's not that easy. Addiction is a difficult thing to shake, and he slips again, even though Jackson tries to help. Soon Jackson can't trust Stiles, and he's not sleeping, worried about the man he loves. Danny notices the effect it is having on Jackson and tells him that he needs to do what's best for himself and he should cut things off with Stiles before he's dragged back down into the pit. Jackson realizes that Danny has a point and he goes home to do just that.

Stiles begs him not to end their relationship, but Jackson sticks to his decision. Stiles has to move out, and the only place he can go is to Scott, who takes him in. But Stiles can't stay away from the drugs, because they are the only thing that makes him feel good. He loses his job and he loses his happiness all over again, and when he is at his worst, Scott and his father do their best to pick him up and help him. Stiles knows that it's his own fault that he has ruined his life all over again, and he goes back to rehab.

He comes back to Scott when it's over, finally feeling stable, but he still doesn't know what to do with his life. Scott and he talk and Stiles admits that music is the one thing that made him feel alive, so Scott tells him that they should _do_ that then. If music helps Stiles, then he should rely on it. And Stiles starts writing again, some of the best lyrics he's ever put out. Break-up songs, and songs about addiction and loss and recovery, and the most heartbreaking songs that he can come up with. But he also writes songs about digging out of the depths and finding hope, and finding his way and still being alive after it all. He and Scott start playing together in small gigs, and are found by a private record label and signed for a two record deal.

It isn't perfect, and it isn't what he had, but he's playing again and Stiles is finally settled and almost happy.

He's been out of his second stint in rehab for a year when he comes backstage after a gig and finds Jackson standing there, waiting for him. They begin all over again with coffee and slow dates, taking it easy this time, making it work. And this time it _does_ work, and together they are stronger.

Stiles doesn't write any more sad songs after that… but it's still the best music he's ever written, and Jackson is always there, at every show, waiting for him in the wings.


	2. Chapter 2 - Save Me (Standalone)

"Jackson, please, don't go!" Jackson hears the scream coming from their bedroom seconds before Stiles catches up with him at his office. An obviously underweight Stiles wearing a plaid shirt and black jeans that look too big on him. And with hair that has grown too long and circles around his eyes.

"Don't leave me," Stiles whimpers. "Just... give another chance, okay?"

Jackson looks at him but there's nothing else he can say at this point anymore.

"Is this what you want, do you want me to beg?" Stiles opens his arms wide as tears start to fall down his cheeks uncontrollably.

"Please, Stiles, don't make it more difficult than it has to be."

Jackson knew this would be hard but watching Stiles in this state really breaks his heart in a million pieces and makes him doubt himself for a moment.

"I. Love. You," Stiles stresses every word.

"I can't live without you, don't you know that?" Stiles asks running his hand through his hair, wiping the tears away with his fingers the best way he can.

"I love you too." Jackson stops for a minute, after placing his laptop in a bag where he's been putting the most important stuff he needs for work that week. His suitcase with clothes for a few days is already in the living room near the door.

"More than you'll ever know... and that's why I've tried to help you. I've fucking fought for us!" Jackson says, raising his voice.

"I've tried really hard. I've done everything I could and it hasn't been enough. We can't go on like this. We just can't." Jackson says tiredly.

"You've been talking to Danny, haven't you? He's been putting all these things in you head. Of course, he has... he hates me!" Stiles says louder than he intended.

"Danny has nothing to do this! And he doesn't hate you," Jackson says upset.

"The hell he hasn't! He's never liked me or my band. He hates my music and he hates me because he wants you all for himself. He's always wanted you and this is his chance, isn't it? I'm sure you're going to his place as soon as you are out of that door -"

"That's enough!" Jackson interrupts him, "I won't let you talk that way about him. He doesn't deserve it. He's my best friend, of course he cares about me, but nothing is ever gonna happen between us and he _knows_ that." Jackson sighs.

"Remember that night when you were so high in that bar, that you couldn't even call to tell me where you were at three in the morning? I was a nervous wreck and I called him in the middle of the night and he came to help me find you. That's the kind of guy he is, and believe it or not, he cares about what happens to you too."

"What about the night I found out you were using again? I was a fucking mess. I called him and he told me to stay strong, that we could beat this together, you and I... but we _can't_. We _can't_ , Stiles. I don't trust you anymore. This whole thing... our relationship is no longer healthy. I can't remember that last time I had a full night sleep... I keep waking up to check that you're lying next to me... I wonder what you're doing when I'm at work..." Jackson says shaking his head.

"I told you yesterday. I'm going back to rehab... I'll go tomorrow if you want me to, okay?" Stiles sounds desperate, but like he knows it's useless at the same time, like he's aware that there's nothing he can do to change his mind.

Jackson snorts and shakes his head before looking back at Stiles.

"The thing is that you need to stay clean _for you_. Go to rehab if you want to go but don't do it for me. Do it for you... do it for your father, for Scott, for your band... but it's too late for us."

Tears are starting to fall down Stiles's cheeks again and it rips Jackson's heart apart. He needs to look away from Stiles's eyes before his resolution is affected like has already happened in the past.

"What band? There's no band anymore." And he has nobody to blame but himself for that. He gave it up when he moved in with Jackson after rehab and took that boring job at the supermarket. It was _his_ choice to leave it behind.

"Then for your music. You don't need a band, you've never needed one."

"What I _need_ is _you_. I don't wanna be without you." Stiles says as he walks two steps forward, placing his hands on Jackson's shoulders, but Jackson quickly removes them, steps away from him. He needs to stay away from physical contact if he's gonna do this.

"You don't need me. What you need is to come out of this. To be the artist you've always been. I never wanted you to take that job, you know that. All I wanted was for you to be happy. To stay clean, but _you_ threw it away."

"But I don't..." Stiles hesitates unsure, "I don't think I can do it without you." And Jackson knows exactly what he means, after all he used to think the same. He used to think that meeting Stiles at rehab and going through it together had helped him because he didn't feel alone. He had someone who motivated him to fight everyday, so he knows it must be scary, the thought of doing it alone this time.

"I'm sorry. I wish I could say I believe you." Jackson's voice breaks a little; all the lies and disappointments of the past come back to him and he remembers the feeling all too well. That's why he's had enough, and even if this is without doubt one of the hardest moments of his life, Danny is right. He needs to do this for both himself and Stiles. He needs to break that bond, although he already knows nobody will ever take that place in his heart.

"I can't let you drag me down with you. I've fought too fucking hard to be where I am today." Jackson shakes his head. "Shit. I owe it to myself to stay sober and the more I'm with you, the more I realise that relapsing is a possibility."

Jackson grabs three folders with the documents of the lawsuit he's working on at the moment and adds them to the other things in the blue bag he usually takes when he's travelling for work.

"I love you," Jackson says with sincerity, "and I was blind. I didn't want to see it... but we aren't good for each other anymore. God, you have to see it too."

"All I see is you kicking me to the curb because I'm not perfect like you. And I'm not strong like you."

Jackson snorts again, "I'm far from perfect. As much as I'd like to be perfect it's been a long time since I found out that I'm not. I royally fucked up my life once and I'm not gonna let myself do it again... not for you and not for anybody else." Sometimes you need to be selfish that way and Jackson can be a selfish asshole when he needs to be. He has practice after all.

"Well, you're perfect to me." And when Stiles looks at him with those adoring eyes, it's almost impossible to say no to him.

"I know you could have left me time ago and you didn't. And I'm sorry," Stiles removes the tears with his fingers again. "I'm _scared_ and I didn't mean any of that. When I'm scared I don't know what comes out of my mouth, you know that. I must sound terribly pathetic. You probably hate me right now."

"No, I could never hate you," Jackson says with sincerity.

"I'm not stupid, you know? I'm an addict and I'm a loser but I know what I've done. I've lied to you, repeatedly... and I've betrayed your trust to the point where you don't want anything to do with me anymore. Shit, you can't even look me in the eyes anymore... and that..." Stiles runs his fingers through his hair as he bites his lip.

"Fuck, this is not how it was supposed to end. I've fucked up everything and I've hurt you..." Stiles closes his eyes for a second as he shakes his head. "I've _really_ hurt you, and I'm so sorry... you're the most important person in my life and the things I've done to you... I can never expect you to forgive me. Just believe that, as pathetic as it sound right now, I am sorry."

"I believe you Stiles. Of course, I do. And to be honest, you don't need my forgiveness. You're sick. You need help. And your father and Scott, even Isaac and Liam, they're always gonna be there for you, band or no band, you know that."

"I talked to your father and he knows, so you have a few days to gather your things and then, it's up to. You can either stay with him or Scott... I don't know... think about it. I'll stay with Danny until then."

"What did my father say?" Stiles asks.

"Not much, really. After what happened... he said he wasn't surprised. That he saw it coming. That he understood, basically, and he wished things had turned out different."

"Shit..." Stiles hakes his head, "he really cares about you, y'know? He never liked any of my boyfriends and when he met you, he was impressed from the start." Stiles smiles briefly as he remembers. "I guess he wondered what someone like you was doing with an addict like me."

"I'm an addict too..." Jackson says simply, because that's the truth, he's no better than Stiles and that's not a fair thing to say about their relationship. "We are no different."

"Your father is a good man and he loves you," Jackson continues. "You should live with him and let him help you, okay? Will you do it?"

There's hope in his voice. After everything that has happened, he's never lost hope. Hope that Stiles will come out of this. Only, it can't be him by his side anymore.

"Yeah... yeah, I'll do it." Stiles nods. "You don't have to worry about me anymore."

 _I'll always worry about you, I can't help it_ , Jackson thinks.

"I'm glad to hear that," Jackson says honestly. "You're doing the right thing. And really, you don't need me for what you have to do. I know you can do it this time if you really want to."

Stiles snorts. "I don't about that. But it's the only thing I can do so... I'll give it a try I guess."

"Okay, I have to go now, I still have stuff to do for work later," Jackson says carrying the bag on his right shoulder as he walks towards the door of the house.

Stiles follows him in silence and it's the weirdest feeling because he knows the next time he comes back to his house, any trace of Stiles would be probably gone, like if their life together had never happened.

Jackson grabs his car keys, placing them in his pocket before opening the door.

"Call me when..." _How do you say when you are gone from here?_ "You know..."

"Yeah," Stiles nods, "I'll call you..."

Thank god, Stiles isn't crying or panicking, which is really a relief. It's hard enough as it is. Jackson wonders if he should hug him like he wants to but decides against it because he's not sure he'd let him go after all.

"Okay, take care of yourself," Jackson says as he grabs his suitcase and comes out of the house.

And that is what you usually say to somebody you're saying goodbye, but in this case he really means it and Stiles knows that.

"I will," Stiles says before closing the door.


End file.
